Tuesday, April 06, 2004

Fishy Business

The robin came back today. He pecked at my window and this time I had no mercy. I ran out there and waved my hands and yelled at him and told him I was scaring him off for his own good. At least he's not flying into the window anymore. He's probly too exhausted.

And here's a funny story for you. Disclaimer: If you're into this kind of stuff then I apologize if any of the following offends you I certainly don't mean to be anti-christian or anything.

If you know me very well you know I don't like "Jesus-y STUFF" Very much. I don't like the idea of commercializing spirituality - though I know it's done all the time. We could go round and round about that I suppose. I have "christian artwork" around, some has meaning to me and I have it for that reason.
My feeling is that there ARE people out there who really do go both ways with the tolerance thing but many people are only religiously tolerant as long as you're not a christian. It's fine if I want to abstain from certain behaviors if I'm practicing Islam or Taoism but if I'm a CHRISTIAN and I do or do not do something for faith reasons some people have illogical reactions to that are based on mostly bad information and in some cases complete ignorance about world religions or spirituality in general. These are the same people that will hold Christians to some standard that no one could possibly live up to and are quick to yell Hypocrite at the first sign of humanity. These are the people I'm going to piss off if I accidentally cut them off in traffic and I've got one of those cute little crosses or fishes on my car. So that's why I don't have a Jesus Loves You bumper sticker on my car. Though If I ever find one that says "Jesus would love you MORE if you DIDN'T DRIVE ON MY BUTT!" I might buy it.
Ok so back to my story. Here's me, in the CHRISTIAN BOOKSTORE getting a Henri Nouwen book and I desperately needed mints. So I looked and the only ones I could find were - you guessed it - the little mints shaped like fishes in a tin that has scripture written on it. They're called SCRIPTURE MINTS.
How cute.
So I bought them out of desperation.
And they tasted nasty.
KA and the Kevmo got a good laugh out of me having SCRIPTURE MINTS in my posession. But here's the kicker. The other day those fish mints were gone all but one and I left the tin in my car as an emergency backup. I bought more mints at Starbucks because I LIKE those. They're YUMMY, not nasty and they don't have the potential of helping me make myself look like a hypocrite! BUT the dang thing had a top that didn't work well so most times I'd try opening it and the whole top HALF would come off and mints would fly all over the place. It was quite annoying and it created in me sinful, violent thoughts of finding the person who put that tin together in the factory and shoving it up their nose.
Last night I had a gentler idea. Aha... I could transfer them to another container that wouldn't irritate the crap out of me! I thought about putting them in a ziploc baggie.... but that just wasn't very neat and tidy.
Finally I remembered I still had that stinking SCRIPTURE MINT TIN!! Perfect! The most redeeming quality of that tin is that it is easy to open. In went the Starbucks Mints and I was golden.
- Except now I'm stuck with the SCRIPTURE MINT TIN for another round and it cracks me up every time I pull it out!
I think it could be an April Fools Joke from God.
Very funny, God.


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